Potty “Training”

So, A has reached her third birthday. We’ve made it that far! ;-) j/k And we’re several months past the new baby’s arrival, so I’m thinkin’, “Ummm…time to crank the potty thing into a higher gear”. The potty has been an informal member of our house since A was 15 or so months old. Very informal, cool, whatever, lets be friends, sit on it to read, clothed/unclothed, we’re cool. She’s occasionally shown mild interest but nothing beyond it being any more than a toy. We’ve gotten the cool Elmo Panties from Target. They are oh-so-cool, but I think A considers them a ‘big girl diaper’. Anytime she wears them, she wets or poops in them. Even though we just got a ‘catch’ earlier.
I’m desperate. Well, not really desperate, but I’d like to nudge this process along a bit. So, even though I didn’t really want to, I finally broke down, got some m&m’s when Publix had them on sale: BOGO, and BRIBED. “A! You can have an M&M if you put tinkle in the potty!” I highly encourage her to drink a whole cup of non-watered-down juice just to make sure this is all possible. Plop her in front of the TV, on the potty, sans-diaper, and hope. Success!
Fast forward one week to her 3 year well visit with the pediatrician and my thought that bribery should NOT be the way, is confirmed by our ped. Her recommendation, since A has NO interest so far, is to give her a choice every morning of panties or a diaper. (This gives her a choice, and the power. Scary, huh?) If/when she has an accident, say, “That’s ok, you’re not ready yet. We’ll try again tomorrow.”, and put her in a diaper for the rest of the day. Sounds good enough. Simple enough. No power struggles. Great. We get home. Next morning, she chooses panties. Great. A bit later, and accident. I go through the prescribed phrase, but she insists on continuing to wear panties. Ok. Panties. A little later, another accident. OK. The girl is obviously thinking that these cool Elmo panties are just another diaper. Not cool. So we put away the panties for awhile while mom regroups. I then decide that the new “choice” will be a diaper, or “nothing, so you can practice using the potty”.
This approach has seemed the best so far, for A. I’m finishing typing this on a Monday afternoon. This is our third day of successful potty catches and no accidents; day 1 & 2 being Thursday and Friday of last week. (As long as I’m comfortable with A running around naked all day!) This weekend just didn’t work since daddy was home and our routine was a little off. We’ll get there eventually though. I’ve given in on not using M&M’s for rewards, I’m just not bribing with them or mentioning them beforehand. Since I started out with those as a bribe, she remembers that, (smart cookie!), and once she has placed her contents in the potty her next words are “I wanna M-eh-N!”. Oh well, we’ll roll with it.
The best part of this laid back approach? I’m not continually enforcing ‘potty-sits’, no power struggles, no stressing about it, and the “victory” is hers to claim. ☺
We’re not there yet though. Not even close. I’m sure there’ll be more bumps along the way, but so far, I’m pretty satisfied with the no-pressure approach.
My initial thoughts going forward, once she masters the potty at home while naked is to next add panties, then the rest of her clothes. After that, we’ll take a few practice runs outside the house to my grandparents house, or Target, or the grocery store for awhile and hopefully we’ll have success and have built confidence. From there, I’m not sure. We’ll take it one day / trip at a time. ☺

Freedom, Politics, Government

Yesterday while out driving, I stopped behind a city pickup truck bearing a bumper sticker that read “Report Unlicensed Construction”, then gave a phone number. So, here are my thoughts on that!

First though, some background: 1 - We bought our house as a fixer-upper and have made lots of cosmetic improvements to it. Replaced appliances, doors, windows, that type of thing. 2 – My grandparents, I believe, are a great example of the American Dream. My grandfather built their entire house himself; dug the well, constructed the septic tank (!!), the entire house, the whole shebang. (No building permits needed back then I guess – late 40’s early 50’s. They raised 3 kids in that house.)

Soapbox/

So, a few years into living and improving our new house, we notice that the water doesn’t stay hot as long as it should for showers. So, we pack up the munchkin and head over to Sears, ‘cause we’re Kenmore folks, pick out a new water heater, arrange to have it installed since this is one project we don’t have the skills to DIY-it…and find out that the county requires a $50 permit for this type of thing! $50! For a permit! Just so I’m “allowed” to install this cheap new water heater? Whoa! C’mon! Why does the government need to get involved in our water heater replacement anyways?!? Shouldn’t that be a little beyond their scope? And who pays? Citizens.

So, while griping about this with another friend, come to find out, ‘technically’ anytime any improvements are made to your house (including new flooring!), require a permit so that tax registers can be updated. Ahhh….so they can collect more money. Cha-ching!

What happened to freedom? That whole work-hard-to-pursue-the-American-Dream thing? Nah, government must control all.

/soapbox

Life Learning

Whenever I get around to getting all three of us out the door and to the library, we have a little routine. First we stop by the book drop to return books that we are finished with or are due. (If there’s a huge stack, I go through the drive-through return so I don’t have to lug a whole armload or bagful of books into the building along with L in the carrier and A pulling at my arm and trying to run off every which way.) Then, if I’m up to it, go by 2 or 3 certain sections, browse quickly, and pick a couple before A runs around to another aisle on the other side and peeks at me inbetween the books, giggling and squealing at her own little game of hide & seek, in the quiet library, no less. (A new ‘rule’ I instated is that she has to stay by mom if we’re going to stay and play with toys in the children’s dept.) Anyways, one of the sections I usually visit is the section with Education and Homeschooling books, usually around Dewey # 371, and last week I checked out “Homeschooling and the Voyage of Self-Discovery” by David Albert , which seems so far, (I’m on page 40 out of 253) to be a collection of essays that he’s written as a homeschooling dad, which has me thinking on education in general and my education and whatnot. I’ve also come across a couple email group posts in the past couple weeks on the same subject recently. A couple years ago while perusing this same section in the library I picked up a couple books by John Holt who seems to be ‘the guy’ in this “school” (ha!) of thought called Unschooling, which says that children are programmed to naturally learn, and that putting them in a structured school situation is not always the best way for them to learn. Children learn an unimaginable amount of information before they even set foot in a structured classroom, and that rate of learning often comes to a screeching halt once they do. Understandably, ‘unschooling’ is not always the answer for every child or every family. Some kids will need the structure, some families can’t afford for a parent to stay home, etc. And I don’t know that it will be the right answer for our family either. However, what I love about the families I’ve read about is their love of learning, modeled by the parents, for the kids, and learning becomes life. Life is learning. Things and situations that are encountered every day, like a trip to the grocery store can be incredible learning experiences. No, subjects are not broken down into nice neat little compartments, but ‘subjects’ overlap in real life.

So, I guess what I’m pondering now, is that “homeschool” doesn’t have to mean “school-at-home”, but homeschooling can give the freedom for kids to live a life that is all about learning.

Routine

I think I’ve finally come to terms with “just” being a SAHM. Yes, this is what I always wanted to be ‘when I grow up’. But that whole thing of having a college degree and having earning ‘potential’ kinda bugged me. Well, maybe not bugged me, but it was just this thought, this ‘thing’, that was there. For the couple of years before A was born, I was the one who brought home the bacon since hubby was in school full time. Once she arrived, hubby was the breadwinner and I stayed home. (Which worked well, btw since we were already used to getting by on one income!) The transition was rather quick too. T started his new job and A was born something like two or three weeks later.

I guess the main thing I missed about the work world was the feeling of accomplishment when reaching goals, checking things off my to-do list, that sorta thing. All that went out the window when my new to-do list revolved around a newborn, which meant ‘nurse baby’ was the #1 priority, and everything else just fell by the wayside. And there’s no feeling of accomplishment when you have to do it all over again in an hour! Baby cries, change diaper, nurse baby, baby falls asleep, mom doesn’t put baby down ‘cause she’ll wake up if she does, baby sleeps while mom reads parenting book, baby wakes up, cries, change diaper….. That’s what my day now looked like. If I got the dishwasher loaded or unloaded, a load of clothes washed, dried or folded, or dinner made in addition to that, I was doing REALLY good.

Enter babywearing. A concept I found while reading one of those parenting books mentioned earlier. I went to Target and got just a cheap Infantino version of the baby bjorn, and was so amazed. I now had two, yes TWO, hands free! And the rest of the story is in a previous blog below. So now I’m able to actually get a few things done while still comforting a baby who needs mommy’s continual touch.

I’ve also gotten back into my ‘reaching goals, checking things off my to-do list’ thing. Except now, the list looks a little different: Potty train toddler (long term to-do), story time, playgroups, support groups, blog… Some get done. Some don’t. But that’s life. :-)

The Greatest Gift

This Christmas is extra special for me this year. Having a little tiny baby this year somehow brings more meaning to the real reason for the Christmas season. I've always known and have been in awe of the fact that God sent his Son to earth as a baby to redeem his chosen children. But this year, holding a new baby in my arms (what often seems as often as 24/7!) brings new meaning and a greater realization of how vulnerable and helpless baby Jesus, our Lord became; and the ultimate sacrifice that He gave was the greatest gift our Lord could ever give.
Merry Christmas!
--C.

Baby Carriers

Over the past couple of years, I’ve managed to collect several different types and styles of baby carriers. Here is our story.
I originally started out with an Infantino Sling Rider, received as a gift before A was born. She absolutely hated and so did I. She screamed, and I couldn’t figure out how the darn thing would actually help. So we returned that one and later purchased an Infantino Easy Rider which is similar to the famous Baby Bjorn. Once I strapped that on and put Abby in it (she was a couple months old at that point), I was amazed that I could actually do chores around the house, use two hands, and not have to put down my screaming I-need-to-be-held-every-waking-and-non-waking-moment baby.

As I read more Attachment Parenting websites and books (mainly Dr. Sears), I heard so much about the acclaimed ‘sling’. So, while cruising Ebay I picked up a used Nojo sling for something like $11. The sling was great for running quick errands since it was easy to quickly pop her in and pull the tail tight in the hip carry or cuddle hold.

Once A got heavier, it became more difficult to wear her for long periods, so we asked for and received an Ergo Carrier for Christmas that year. The Ergo is great for wearing baby on your back, but it takes a bit of practice to learn how to get baby onto your back and strapped in while you’re by yourself and have no help or anyone to ‘spot’. Once you’ve figured it out though and have had a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy. The Ergo also can be used to carry baby in the front, and has an option for wearing on the hip, but I never figured that one out. The sling worked well for the hip carry already. As A approached her second birthday, we mainly used the sling for quick in-and-out trips and the Ergo for longer trips, walks, or hikes.

When we found out we were expecting L, I searched the internet for instructions on making ring slings. The Nojo sling has lots of padding which makes it bulky to carry in a diaper bag, and the padded rings make it difficult to pull it tight enough sometimes. I knew that with a newborn, I’d need to be able to pull it tighter. I did not, however, want to spend big bucks on something that I was pretty sure I could make myself. The sling I made has no padding and has quite a long, open tail that’s handy to use for a nursing cover up or to cover L when the sun is bright. Having all of her weight on one shoulder though, can be tiring after even half an hour. And at this point (almost 2 months old), she still can’t be carried in my favorite way to carry in a sling: the hip carry. However, the ring sling is great for when L has fallen asleep after nursing, I’ve adjusted her to an upright position, tummy to tummy. I’m able to slip the sling over my head and tighten, and she’s not disturbed at all and stays asleep! Before L was born, I also purchased a Moby wrap on clearance. Before the birth, I tried to figure out how to tie it and use it, but with my big belly, that was quite difficult. :)

Another of our purchases before L’s birth was a Mei Tai carrier by Baby So Smart. In L’s 2 months so far, I think I’ve used this carrier the most. It’s great for grocery shopping and other errands. She’s still held facing me like in the Bjorn-like carrier, but her feet aren’t dangling. Some have said that the carriers that support them from the crotch area and let their feet and legs dangle aren’t good for their little developing spines since there’s so much pressure on their spine. The Mei Tai carries them in a similar position, is still easy to tie, but eliminates the concern of spine development.



A couple weeks ago, I finally picked up the Moby and was determined to figure out how to use it. Once I practiced the main wrapping instructions a couple times, it got much easier and I’m able to do it rather quickly now. I love too, that L’s weight is distributed all over my back and shoulders and doesn’t dig anywhere. She loves it too, and falls asleep quickly once she’s placed in the wrap. In fact, as I’m typing this, she is in the wrap asleep, Tummy-to-tummy, as I bounce on a large exercise ball. That’s her favorite way to be soothed. It puts her right to sleep. :-)

Cloth wipes solution

Last night I finally got around to making our new cloth wipes solution which will make cloth wipes easier to use at our house. It’s often easier to just grab the disposable wipes when I’ve got 2 screaming babies who need to be changed rather than wetting down the cloth wipes, that sat dry on top of the dresser, with either the spray bottle with water & EOs (Essential Oils) or wetting in the sink under running water (hot water if I’m able to wait).

So, I combined a couple squirts of Dr Bronner’s, some water, and 10 drops of my EO combo of lavender and tea tree oil. (I later decided 5 drops would have been more than enough as 10 made it way too strong.) I then dumped it all in an old Pampers wipes plastic container, added some washcloths folded in half and some old cut up t-shirts and voila, we’re in business. At least for a day or two. Once they’re all gone, we just repeat the process. This solution can be a bit cold though, especially in the winter months, so we’re asking Santa for a wipes warmer this Christmas. :-)

I still use disposable diapers at night on both babies, so we still use disposable wipes when changing a baby out of a ‘sposie. That way, there’s only one stop after the change: the diaper pail or the trashcan. And disposable wipes are all I carry in the diaper bag for when we’re not home. It’s just easier that way at this point.